Pause Before You Respond

Elder David A. Bednar taught: “Instead of thinking, ‘What am I going to tell them?’ the focus should be, ‘What would I ask them?’ And … ‘What would I invite them to do?’”

When a student makes a comment or asks a question, pause and think:

• What can I ask? – to help them seek their own answer through the Holy Ghost.

• What can I invite them to do? – to act on personal revelation.

Examples

• “I pray all the time, but I don’t think God hears me.”

• “Church is boring … I don’t get anything out of it.”

• “Oh, I'm never getting married!”

• “What’s the point of reading scriptures? I don’t understand half of it.”

• “I’m scared to share the gospel—I don’t want my friends to think I’m weird.”

• "How do I get more from the atonement then just forgiveness?"

Model

Student: “I don’t think the Holy Ghost really answers me.”Teacher (pauses, thinks): “What could I ask or invite that connects them to the Spirit?”I nstead of saying: “Oh, He does answer—you just need to pay attention.” The teacher asks: “Can you think of a time you felt peace or clarity when you didn’t expect it?” Then invites: “This week, try writing down every small moment you feel peace, and let’s talk about what you notice.”

Try This

This week, when a student asks something, pause and silently ask yourself:👉 “What can I ask?”👉 “What can I invite them to do?” Then let the Spirit guide your response.